Monday, January 16, 2017

Amelia Rose

I just realized today that I haven't written a blog post about Amelia being born...

Amelia Rose was born February 24, 2016 at 11:20 p.m. to Karen and Grover. She weighed 6 lbs 9 oz and measured 18 inches long.

I went to the hospital around 10, and got so sleepy that I had to leave. I was so hoping to be at the hospital when she was born, but the little stinker didn't make her appearance until just a few minutes after I left.

Karen brought Millie to see her Grandma Mema a few days laters. Such a sweetie pie! (Both of them, actually.)




And here's Karen's part of the story:
On February 24 I went to the midwife for check up. I had been in and out of the hospital for painful Braxton hicks and later to find out two full kidneys of kidney stones. I was sitting at a steady 2 for almost a week. The midwife looks at me and goes I know you've been in pain so I'm just going to strip your membranes now. You should have your baby in about 24 hrs. I was planning a natural birth, so I had to stay at home right up until the time. I told Grove and it was only his second day at his new job and we didn't want to screw it up. So he said he would make it as soon as possible. It's noon I can make it for 7 more hours.
I start cleaning the house, jamming to my music, went and got the kids McDonald's. Come home and hits me. Ouch that one hurt. Ouch there's another one. I'm thinking was that five minutes? Holy crap less than five minutes? I call Grove, no answer. I call his sister Rose (who was going to be there when amelia was born) no answer. I text her and say baby's coming get a hold of Grove! My next thought I'm not having this baby here! I got the boys' jackets and shoes on. If I remember right Ben had a tantrum about his shoes so I picked him up and carried to the car. I sat there called Grove one more time, left a not so nice voice-mail and started think. I'm trying to breathe, and think I know who to call! My mama Melody. If I'm going to have a baby in my car she's the one I want talking to me. I don't remember everything we said but I remember dropping the boys off at my mom's and getting to the hospital in under 10 minutes. I remember while I was driving to the hospital I started panicking, I was dizzy because I was hyperventilating. I told Melody I'm going to have to do this by myself. I remember her asking who I wanted there and I told her anyone!
I'm still like this with Melody. When I should be calling the dr. Or 911 I'm calling Melody. She relaxes me or confirms maybe you should call the dr. Or I'm calling the dr! She's literally my life line.
She talked to me until I got into the hospital. I ran up to the desk and said I'm going to have a baby! The nurse hurried and got me a wheelchair and took me into the room. She gave me a gown and asked me to get dressed. My midwife came in asked when my contractions got worse and how far apart they were. And bam while I was standing in the bathroom taking my pants off my water broke all over the floor. "I think my water just broke!!" My midwife came in and said yes it did.
I got the gown on, laid in bed and contractions are intense and I can't move. I have to close my eyes and ball up my fists every other minute. Being trapped in a bed and not being able to move is horrible with contractions!
My midwife came back in and asked would you like an epidural now? I remember thinking I'm going to do this all by myself. Damn right I want an epidural! They came in fast, I remember getting ready for the pinch in my back which really feels more like a stab in the back wishing Grove was there. Then I thought about Melody. Holding my hand the last time with Ben. Tears came flooding down. It was finally over. I lay back down finally relief and there Grove walks through the door! Where we're you 5 minutes ago buddy?! Little did I know as soon as he got the message he drove from Salt Lake straight to the hospital in under 45 minutes. My midwife told him things slowed down and he could leave and take a shower! Well.. I didn't bring anything with me so I guess that's ok. Grove seemed relieved because he was dirty head to toe (maybe that's why my midwife told him he could take a shower) 😉 so I'm panicked again! I'm doing this by myself! And then the troops come in! I think Paul and his girlfriend came first. And then Jess and Em. Or it might have been the other way around. I remember having nobody to having a full room. Melody sure did deliver!♡ Everyone started talking and really calmed my nerves. Calmed them to a point that I was getting tired. I remember Melody and Matt coming later I don't know if Grove got back before or after. But everyone was there. Melody brought me relief and lots of love.
The midwife came in and checked me a couple times. I just wasn't moving anywhere closer. It was close to 11 and everyone was so tired. I think Jess had to get up at 5 and Paul and Melody worked all day. I totally understood why they wanted to leave. I felt bad trying to sleep with them there. Now that I'm thinking about it I think they gave me medicine to speed things up and it was making it hard to breathe. I remember being light headed and ready to pass out, and Melody saying, "Hey! She's dizzy, what's going on?!" (If I'm ever to shy to say anything Melody always has my back)♡
Anyways they say goodbye and Rose, Em, and Grove are left. Grove goes and lays down on the couch I start closing my eyes. I'm about half way between sleep and consciousness when the midwife says she wants to check me. She goes to put her hand under my gown when she exclaims, "I can't get my fingers in because her head is right there!" Everything happened really fast after that, rushing tables and nurses. She was born about 5 minutes later. Fast! I remember thinking I almost gave birth to a whole room of people! Quite the experience!

(I'm so glad that you wrote, that, Karen. I had forgotten so much. And I'm so glad that I can be there for you when you need it. ♥ Thank you for loving me, and I sure love you a whole bunch!)

♥ Grandma Mema, AKA Melody

Friday, December 30, 2016

Detaching with Love

Today, I read something in Madeleine L'Engle's book, "A Circle of Quiet," that really resonates with things I've been learning in Al Anon.

On page 118, she writes,
"It takes a tremendous maturity, a maturity I don't possess, to strike the balance of involvement/detachment which makes us creatively useful, able to be compassionate, to be involved in the other person's suffering rather than in our response to it."
The first time I encountered this idea was in the Detachment bookmark that I was given on my first visit to Al Anon:





It is something that I struggle with daily, but when I make things all about me, it causes all sorts of sickness, mental and physical. It is only when I have detachment with love that I am able to be of value in someone else's life.
♥ Melody